Telling the Truth in love
A radical departure from the very un-grace full things I would have like to have written about my friend's mother ... a tribute to my Facebook Husband (Facebook is an on-line community of college students, I enjoy fake relationship statuses, and Tony is my current husband."
Tony tells me that it would be really easy for me to lose weight if I exercised. Tony is (obviously) skinny and has (obviously) never tried to lose weight. I realize this statement to be completely untrue and this realization immediately negates most of Tony’s other statements. All of his theological reasoning and political ideology is completely eviscerated because this statement is untrue. Tony made one completely erroneous statement and I disregard everything he has ever defended as fact.
I love Tony and cherish our friendship, but I disagree with a lot of what he says. It was his roommate who yelled at me for being a liberal. When I cried the following day it wasn’t because I failed a final, it wasn’t because a good friend had been violently beaten and raped, and it wasn’t because someone disagreed with me. I cried because Tony didn’t stick up for me. When his roommate made ugly accusations he didn’t defend me. (Take this with a grain of salt – I was an emotional basket case last week.) I still love Tony. Tony and his roommate think that I fail sinners because I won’t harshly confront their sin.
Pastor Charles told a story of a boy caught stealing some penny candy. The store owner made him tell his parents what he had done. He father said, “My son is a criminal.” His mother said, “No he isn’t, my son’s going to be a pastor.” The father told the truth in love. His son had committed a criminal action and the father loved his son enough to tell the truth. But, the mother showed truer love. The mother looked at what was possible. I look at sinners and realize that I was once there (and occasionally find myself there again). I feel that as a Christian it’s my job to let them know that there is a better option. Sin is fun … but not fun enough to compare to God.
I won’t tell a sinner he isn’t allowed to sin because of my morality. I will instead offer him forgiveness and a chance at a life far better than sin. In the story of the prodigal son the father allowed his son to go, knowing that no good would come of it. The father didn’t stop his son to protect him. He let his son choose the wrong path. When I let a sinner do that I’m accused of being unloving. I find that upsetting. Most people don’t understand just how much love it takes to let a child make a mistake. God doesn’t want us to legislate morality. He wants us to grow closer to Him – most often he will let us make some wrong choices and screw up a few times. It’s how we learn best.
I still love Tony, and I know that when he realizes how much love it takes to allow a friend to learn from his or her own mistakes he will understand that I really am taking a loving approach to sinners.
Tony tells me that it would be really easy for me to lose weight if I exercised. Tony is (obviously) skinny and has (obviously) never tried to lose weight. I realize this statement to be completely untrue and this realization immediately negates most of Tony’s other statements. All of his theological reasoning and political ideology is completely eviscerated because this statement is untrue. Tony made one completely erroneous statement and I disregard everything he has ever defended as fact.
I love Tony and cherish our friendship, but I disagree with a lot of what he says. It was his roommate who yelled at me for being a liberal. When I cried the following day it wasn’t because I failed a final, it wasn’t because a good friend had been violently beaten and raped, and it wasn’t because someone disagreed with me. I cried because Tony didn’t stick up for me. When his roommate made ugly accusations he didn’t defend me. (Take this with a grain of salt – I was an emotional basket case last week.) I still love Tony. Tony and his roommate think that I fail sinners because I won’t harshly confront their sin.
Pastor Charles told a story of a boy caught stealing some penny candy. The store owner made him tell his parents what he had done. He father said, “My son is a criminal.” His mother said, “No he isn’t, my son’s going to be a pastor.” The father told the truth in love. His son had committed a criminal action and the father loved his son enough to tell the truth. But, the mother showed truer love. The mother looked at what was possible. I look at sinners and realize that I was once there (and occasionally find myself there again). I feel that as a Christian it’s my job to let them know that there is a better option. Sin is fun … but not fun enough to compare to God.
I won’t tell a sinner he isn’t allowed to sin because of my morality. I will instead offer him forgiveness and a chance at a life far better than sin. In the story of the prodigal son the father allowed his son to go, knowing that no good would come of it. The father didn’t stop his son to protect him. He let his son choose the wrong path. When I let a sinner do that I’m accused of being unloving. I find that upsetting. Most people don’t understand just how much love it takes to let a child make a mistake. God doesn’t want us to legislate morality. He wants us to grow closer to Him – most often he will let us make some wrong choices and screw up a few times. It’s how we learn best.
I still love Tony, and I know that when he realizes how much love it takes to allow a friend to learn from his or her own mistakes he will understand that I really am taking a loving approach to sinners.
posted by Michael Airgood at 11:13 PM
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